Friday, February 27, 2009

Vocab guide for Men

Someone at work gave me this great little list, and I though I would be kind and share it with you all.

Nine words women use:

1) FINE: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

2) FIVE MINUTES: If she is getting dressed, this means half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

3) NOTHING: This is the calm before the storm. This means something and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with NOTHING usually end in FINE.

4) GO AHEAD: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!!!

5) LOUD SIGH: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing)

6) THAT'S OKAY: This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. 'That's okay' means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7) THANKS: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is pure sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome', that will bring on a 'whatever'.

8) WHATEVER: is a woman's way of saying screw you!

9) DON"T WORRY ABOUT IT, I GOT IT: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to #3.

Please print this out for you're husbands to use as a pocket reference. If I save any marriages you can make the check out to Brandie M. Walker.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Frozen Snotsicles

On this beautiful spring like day, I though I would take the opportunity to remind you how grateful you are for the sunshine. A few weeks ago we sluffed church and went skiing as a family for the day. Now I know I don't need a very good excuse to sluff church, sore toe, tickly throat, new movie release etc. but this actually was a great way to spend a Sunday afternoon. We decided to form our own new church dubbed "The church of the Sunday afternoon snow carvers". If you would like to join you must call ahead for reservations. (The Land Rover only holds 7). Here are some pix of our first meeting. The opening hymn was "Oh How Lovely was the Morning" and the prayer was given by Mother Nature.

Zac's second time but already rippin it up

Mr. Cool Luke
Me, Wade and Zac on the lift (imagine the tangling of apparatus's as we all disembarked)

My hero and snowboard coach extraordinare

Luke and Jake on their own for most of the day

All went well for our first meeting. No injuries were incurred. Nobody fell off the lift which is a miracle if you ask my big brother. Apparently I spent a lot of my childhood Saturday's on the slopes falling off of chairlifts and having to be rescued by the resort staff. (Don't ask me how this happened) I now am acutely aware of how far down it is and am constantly telling Zac to stop bouncing the chair to which he responds "You're such a wimp Mom". It sucks when you're not you're 5 year old's hero anymore. I'll just stop feeding him for a few day's to remind him how much he likes me.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

Winter Wonderland

Winter is finally coming to an end. We are all feeling a tinge of spring fever, so before we wish it all away I thought I would post a few pictures that I took this winter.

Lonely Poles:Trail of Sunshine:

Winter Berries:

Signage out of place:

Me and Mom Snowshoeing:

Elk Crossing Hole #5:

Heavy Trees:

Hope you enjoyed. Now go make a snowball and eat it.

Saturday, February 07, 2009

Feel My Pain

I have been a naughty lazy blogger lately. Not much to write about in the long lazy days of winter. As a special treat I thought I would subject you all to a pictorial of my life living in a house full of boys. PS all of these photos were taken on a Saturday morning, un-altered and un-encouraged.

Apparently at our house you will die of a poisonous ingestion if you eat the edges of a pop-tart. My kids call them the 'crust' and will not touch them.

Next we have the graveyard of army guys, monopoly pieces, and Chewbacca thrown in for good measure. There was a very bloody war last night and this is the battlefield leftovers.

This is one of my daily struggles. Can we all see the coat rack on the wall with the coats strategically placed on the floor beneath it to drive me to the brink of insanity?

Here we have the remnants of the last Indianapolis 500. Losers on the Left. My little guys are constantly asking for new cars. They each have a box of 100 so I tell them that they must retire an old one before getting a new. It takes hours to decide who to send to the junkyard.

This is the handy-dandy candy wrapper deposit station located behind Luke's bed. He's waiting for the plastic fairy to come clean it all up for him.

When boys become teenagers they aren't happy with cookies for their sleepovers anymore. They have to have a 12 pack of the sugariest, most caffeinated beverage available to man. Then they drink it all down in one night between 2 people.

And finally the piece-de-resistance. What house with boys is complete without the little yellow drops of sunshine to be found on every porcelain surface throughout the entire house. This is just a sampling and is not for the faint of heart.

Thanks for enjoying my gallery. I truly hope there was no picture induced vomiting. Comments are welcome.